I keep a plate of coffee beans on my desk. They smell great and they look beautiful. The plate was a present from a friend and has significance to me. They work for me as my ‘positivity tracker.’

The human brain is wired to notice negativity. There’s a very good reason for that - its about survival. As we evolved, having a sharp eye out for threats and anticipating when things might go wrong was literally a matter of life or death. So the brain will prioritise negative information and thoughts.

It’s easy to get into a habit of thinking negatively about ourselves, calling into question our every judgement and achievement. We have to learn to live with the inevitability of this to a certain extent as part of being human. To be honest, it’s good to be humble - who wants to be the person who always thinks they are greatest and has all the answers? 

But at the same time, we need to find balance, and take the time to notice when we do good things and make the right choices. This is where the beans come in.

Every time I do something that I know is a good thing, either for myself or for someone else, I put a bean in the jar next to the plate. It can be anything at all that I consider makes the world a better place. Get up and do my yoga? Bean in the jar. Write a letter to my mum? Another bean. Send a thank you text or e-mail? That’s worth one. Pick up a colleague’s favourite coffee pods in the supermarket? Yes, that’s one. Make it home on time from work even if it felt a struggle? One bean.

It means when you are having a bad day, you can always look at that jar and think: “Today did not go well, but I am not a bad person. I have done all these good things.”

It also means that you are building another very powerful habit - self praise. And we now that people who are kind to themselves tend to be kind to others too. Noticing the positive is a habit worth practising.